Depression affects each aspects of our life, especially, During dating it creates lots of problem. 11 Tips for dating with depression is must read for all concern person.
Forget about the normal times, even at the best of the times, dating can be difficult. And if you are suffering from depression the situation becomes even worse. Because at one hand it is your past which causes trouble for you and on other hand your future is in your next dating.
So, for those, who are suffering from depression here we have given some practical tips, useful ideas, solid suggestions which can be used while dating with someone.
1. WE ALL HAVE PAST-YOUR PAST MAY INCLUDES DEPRESSION
Depression is one of the major problem (Sorry, to admit it but depression is not a disease) of 20th Century. Fast life, professional responsibilities & constant up and down(high & law) in relationship are some of the factors which are largely responsible for depression.
So, you suffer from depression, do not worry, because you are not alone, there are millions of people like you.
But, try to remember that depression in nothing to feel ashamed and more over depression does not define who you are. None of us are perfect, unfortunately your past or present includes depression.
So, first of all, accept it and be comfortable with yourself.
2.HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT PROFESSIONAL HELP?
Once you have accepted with yourself now depending upon the degree of depression you may think about seeking professional help.
It is estimated that more than 80 percent of people, who treats it’s depression with Therapy and/or medication gets relief from symptoms.
Because with greater awareness about it the stigma of mental illness diminished and it helps you to fight against fatigue, irritability, low self-esteem, self pity and reduced libido.
So, seek treatment. If you have not seek yet.
3. LICK YOUR OWN WOUNDS FIRST
When in relationship, you may need to take care of someone else. But, before that you need to take good care of yourself. And for that, it is essential to engage yourself in positive self-talk, take your medication regularly, do not miss single session of your therapy, always engage yourself with positive people like your family and friends, means find out reliable support system which lick or helps to lick your wounds first.
4. FIRST DATE IS NOT APPROPRIATE TIME TO TELL YOUR PARTNER
In any give situation or circumstance avoid to tell your partner about your depression on your first date.
Remember that this is your first date, you don’t know how the relationship will turn on future, whether there is another date or no? you are not quite sure about anything so always avoid it.
5. APPROPRIATE TIME & WAY OF TELLING TO YOUR PARTNER
After first date, picture may become quite clear for you. There is no perfect time or circumstance, but at least, when you feel that slowly and steadily relationship is taking more serious turn, it has moved beyond superficial stage to most intimate moments. This is the perfect time to discuss all skeletons in the closet, which haven’t been discussed yet.
Instead of telling it in straightforward manner, explain him/her slowly that you are suffering from depression and you are seeking treatment about it.
6. BE PREPARED FOR CONSEQUENCES OF TELLING YOUR PARTNER
OK, at appropriate time and in appropriate way you have informed your partner about your suffering from depression.
There are two probabilities.
First, He/she turn tail and run away. Thank God, that very early you came to know the real person beneath the beautiful mask. Because, it may sound very trite but absolutely true that, to deal with the depression with the partner who will not support you seems very much difficult.
7. SECOND PROBABILITY
Despite of knowing that you are suffering from depression, still he/she stuck with you, your half of the struggles ends here. Because, it make your partner understand and care more for you. And due that whenever you need her/his help, without hesitation you can ask for it. Telling them about the hardship, problems, difficulties and challenges you faces due to depression may help them to understand you better and whenever he/she commit for serious relationship, they are thoroughly prepared for it.
8. BE HONEST AND TELL ABOUT YOUR LOW LIBIDO
In any given situation honesty is the best policy and if you found dishonest by your partner it scuttle your relationship faster.
Once you have discussed about your depression with your partner do not forget or ashamed to discuss about your low libido(Your sexual drive). Because medication, some antidepressants combined with depression may affect your sexual urge and due to that you may lose interest in sex.
9. KEEP IN MIND YOUR PAST MISTAKES
As a person you are best judge of yourself. You are very much aware about your strength and weakness, you know very well in past, what worked best and worst for you, so, keeping all these in mind always avoid the mistakes you have committed in past.
10. USE INTERNET EFFECTIVELY
There are many sites which specifically provides service for mentally ill people.
But if you go main stream and be specific about your requirements, persistent on your efforts and without giving up try continuously, chances are that sooner or later you may find someone, who accept you with your depression.
11.FUN- MAKE IT ESSENTIAL PART OF YOUR DATING
Do not forget to make your dating fun oriented, because basically dating is supposed to be fun. Do not be too much serious, because not necessarily your first date will lead you to a second date.
Remember that during best of the times dating can cause lots of anxiety, so when you are dating with depression keep your expectations low. Having realistic expectations may create less tension and pressure on you.